Schrutè Farms

If you’re looking for a rustic getaway with questionable plumbing, beet-based breakfast options, and a host who believes eye contact is a form of dominance, Schrute Farms is... unforgettable. We arrived just in time for the “Authentic Agrarian Experience,” which turned out to be Mose sprinting through a cornfield in a cape made of burlap sacks. Shadow, our black Labrador and self-appointed farm inspector, took one look at Mose and launched into a full-on chase. It was less “pastoral retreat” and more “Scooby-Doo meets The Blair Witch Project.” The highlight? Shadow cornered Mose behind the barn, lifted a leg, and christened Dwight’s prized tractor like it was the Liberty Bell. Dwight screamed something about “beet blight via canine urea” and tried to issue us a fine payable in Schrute Bu

I took the goat pack, obviously because it has the most amount of goats. I was offered Giraffe burger but I decided to stay with the goats. It was austere experience, the host kept yelling the names of my guests, not sure how he knew them as I did not share my guest list with him. Mose was a delight. 10 starts.

The best Beet Farms we have ever been to. Mose showed my neice Sophia and I how to make fresh canned beets. One of the cleanest outhouses we have ever been to....

★★★★★ "Beets, Bears, and the Best Bed & Breakfast Experience" If you’re looking for a five-star resort with luxury amenities—go somewhere else. But if you want an authentic agritourism experience complete with beet-stained hands, questionable historical reenactments, and the occasional threat of wolf attacks, Schrute Farms is the place for you. The rooms? Rustic. The beds? Firm enough to realign your spine. The breakfast? Beets in ways you never imagined (and maybe never wanted). Dwight Schrute himself gave me a personal tour, which included a riveting lecture on manure. I was also forced to participate in a barnyard wrestling match against Mose. I lost. Overall, 10/10 experience—would return, but only after mentally preparing for another round of beet wine and Schrute family hospitalit

I wish I could download the song that’s posted in the picture area. Anyone know?