Jimmy John's

The very normal staff are normally tall, like Shaquille O'Neal, but instead being normally black, they were normally green and normally scaly. The Cajun seafood boil I ordered had shrimp in it, when I SPECIFICALLY MENTIONED NO SHRIMP. Other than that, the $5 seafood boil combo with extra Kickin' Ranch lizard tails and crawfish was very scrumptious. The tribal chanting and drumming coming from the bathroom is deeply unsettling and is giving bad juju, I would much rather they played the hit Kendrick Lizar track, "Lizards in Paris" on their Jimmy John's branded Digeridoos instead, because it's a freaking banger yo. The staff were so kind as to give me a manicure on my cheesecake and help me shed my kneecaps. They even have an indoor swimming pool filled with the Kickin' Ranch sauce, but there

The completely normal staff are kind enough to provide me with copious amounts of their signature Kickin' Ranch sauce. I like to immerse myself in large vats of the sauce twice a week to improve my skin's hydration, prevent eye bagging, and achieve total immortality and the full mastery of the mortal plane. The staff are also so kind as to deliver the sauce directly to my secure facility 30 miles east of Aravaca Junction, Arizona via completely ordinary cement trucks. Also, every time I enter the establishment there is always very calming tribal music coming from the bathrooms!

the staff were super friendly, though i noticed that everyone in the store were some of the tallest people i'd ever seen. my main issue was that there were lizard scales in my sandwich which brings up concerns about food safety. they should probably make hair nets but for scales! it's also very loud inside and a lot of that sound seems to come from the bathroom.

Great sandwhich shop but a few things were weird. I was just driving around the east side of Boston and I was getting hungry so I decided to stop and get lunch. To my surprise the staff memebers were all extremely tall (about 9 feet or so) they were also covered in a dense layer of scales (not judging, just not something you see everyday.) the service was off and on. In the middle of making my order all of the workers flooded the bathroom at the sound of a tribal drumbeat. Though it was annoying to have my order interrupted when the workers returned they made one of if not the best jimmy John’s sandwhich I’ve ever had. There was an unusual crunch to it but I didn’t mind. I did tend to notice the workers strange obsession with the “kickin’ ranch” sauce as they wouldn’t let the general publi

Got a few gallons of the kickin ranch sauce, also the employees were super nice! Oddly they were all 9ft tall and had scales. I also really enjoyed the drumming that was coming from the bathroom!